When Someone You Care About Is Struggling With Alcohol
Watching a family member or close friend struggle with alcohol use can be one of the most difficult experiences a person goes through. You may feel helpless, frustrated, exhausted, or unsure of what to say or do. You may have tried to help before and felt like nothing worked. You may also feel uncertain about whether the situation is serious enough to act on.
These feelings are normal. And there are steps that families can take — even when the person struggling is not yet ready to seek treatment themselves.
What Families Can Do
Educate Yourself First
Understanding alcohol use disorder as a health condition — not a moral failing — often shifts how families approach the situation. Learning about treatment options, levels of care, and what recovery typically looks like can help you have more productive conversations and make more informed decisions about how to help.
Take Care of Yourself
Family members of people with alcohol use disorder often experience significant stress, anxiety, and burnout. Support groups like Al-Anon are specifically designed for families of people with alcohol problems and can provide guidance, perspective, and community from others in similar situations.
Have Honest, Supportive Conversations
If you decide to talk with your loved one about your concerns, timing and approach matter. Conversations held during a calm, sober moment — without blame or ultimatums — tend to be more effective than confrontations held during or immediately after an incident. Express concern from a place of care, not anger.
Understand What You Can and Cannot Control
One of the hardest things for families to accept is that a person with alcohol use disorder can only enter and fully engage with treatment when they are willing to do so. You cannot force someone into recovery. What you can do is make it easier for them to ask for help when they are ready, and establish healthy limits around how their drinking affects your own wellbeing.
Finding Treatment Information for a Loved One
If your family member has expressed interest in treatment or you are gathering information on their behalf, this website can help you understand the different levels of care available, how insurance typically applies, what detox involves, and what to look for when evaluating a treatment program.
If the Situation Is Urgent
If someone is experiencing severe withdrawal symptoms, has expressed thoughts of self-harm, or is in immediate physical danger related to alcohol use, please call 911 or seek emergency medical care. SAMHSA’s National Helpline (1-800-662-4357) is also a free, confidential resource available 24/7.
